Paring down

~

After living here for thirteen years,

I’m thinning out the landscaping

around our house which has become a jungle

of overgrown shrubs and bushes,

thistles, dandelions, witchgrass, and ivy.

~

For the first time in my life, I’m cutting carbs:

swapping blueberry muffins for plain yogurt,

russet potatoes for cauliflower rice,

chocolate chip cookies and fudge cake

for apple slices and Macadamia nuts.

~

I’m thinking it’s time to clean out my closets

of old sport coats, ties, and ugly sweaters,

give away toys and games the grandchildren

will never play again, those college notes,

diaries and journals no one will ever read,

post cards and souvenirs from God knows where.

~

And while I’m at it, how about

weeding out the landscape of my mind—

obsessions about who I think other people think I am,

anxieties over what I cannot change,

fears about what hasn’t happened yet,

critical voices from seventy years ago?

~

Recently, as part of a retreat on Hope,

our director suggested we make a list

of all our hopes, then cross out each one.

What remains, he said, is Hope.

~

Around me, the trees are taking

off their gaudy clothing,

leaving bare limbs to intertwine like lovers,

expanding horizons.

~ ~

This Year’s Garden

~

This year’s garden is smaller than last year’s garden

which was smaller than my garden the year before

as I become less able to kneel dig lift.

Still I’m grateful to be able to garden at all.

For seventy years, gardens have been my teachers

admonishing me to plan prepare plant

water weed and wait 

for a power greater than myself

to provide the needed sun and rain

bees and worms.

To trust that in the liminality 

between planting and emerging

when nothing seems to be going on

new life is exploding.

So much happens beneath the surface.

To accept that not every seed will sprout

nor every seedling survive 

nor every plant produce

and that weeds are always with us.

To live in the faith

because it’s been true for 70 years

and why should this year be any different

that the harvest will come.

To be thankful 

to share 

and then lie fallow

resting in readiness …

~ ~